what you read may deceive

A promise or a dare.. I would jump if I knew you’d catch me.. Staring over the edge.. I can’t tell if you’ll be here for me.. I close my eyes and make a wish.. Turn out the lights and take a breath..
Pray that when the wick is burned, you would say that it’s all about love..

You were there when I needed you.. You were there when the skies broke wide, wide open.. You were never here..

I remember you said "Love was more than your good intentions," Empty boxes on the floor, things I never asked you for.. I pray that when the wick is burned you would say that it’s all about love..

I can’t see the promise of excuses you fall upon.. I pray to God not holding on to things you’ve left undone..

You say you heard every word but I watched you turn away.. Your eyes grew colder than winter.. "Love is so intrusive," I thought I heard you say and laugh so unconvincingly.. Famous last words, "I’m not ready yet," "I won’t be gone a minute".. Narrow is the road and too high a price to pay when loneliness is such a sanctuary.. Empty are the musings and wasted are the days when you say you were only waiting.. If tomorrow never comes, will I ever know that I was in love?

Hello, good morning, how you do?
What makes your rising sun so new?
I could use a fresh beginning too..
All of my regrets are nothing new..
So this is the way that I say I need you..
This is the way that I’m learning to breathe..
I’m learning to crawl..
I‘m finding that you and you alone can break my fall..
I’m living again, awake and alive..
I’m dying to breathe in these abundant skies..

Hello, good morning, how you been?
Yesterday left my head kicked in..
I never, never thought that I would fall like that..
Never knew that I could hurt this bad..

I wish I had what I needed to be on my own beause I feel so defeated and I’m feeling alone.. And it all seems so helpless and I have no plans.. I’m a plane in the sunset with nowhere to land.. And all I see, it could never make me happy and all my sand castles spend their time collapsing.. Let me know that you hear me.. Let me know your touch.. Let me know that you love me and let that be enough.. It’s my birthday tomorrow.. No one here could know.. I was born this Thursday, 22 years ago.. And I feel stuck watching history repeating.. Yeah, who am I? Just a kid who knows she’s needy..